Norming and Storming
When I'm engaging in a new community, one I'm building or newly joining, I am very aware of my lack of knowledge regarding norms. Norms in communities are essential to their health and well-being. The hard thing is that most often norms require storms.
What do I mean?
Norming and storming is the cycle of growth in communities. The initial folks gather and create norms. As others enter in there will be storms, conflict, and then new norms will be created. This process creates a spiral of depth in community.
Communities that seek to avoid conflict at all costs remain in a faux honeymoon. They never become all that they could be. Depth of relationship never grows.