Do you ever feel like you don’t have what it takes?

There are days when I wake up, consider the tasks before me, and think, “How can I possibly do this?”

Life is messy. It often feels like the world is on fire, and I’m armed with nothing but a nearly empty squirt gun. When I read the news, I see so much work that needs to be done. The world is so vast, yet I am so small. The problems in my neighborhood, my town, my state, my country, and the world are, at times, overwhelming.

There have been times in my life when, just looking at what’s happening within my own family, I don’t think I have what it takes.

This conversation Jesus had with his disciples resonates with me:

Some time after this, Jesus crossed to the far shore of the Sea of Galilee (that is, the Sea of Tiberias), and a great crowd of people followed him because they saw the signs he had performed by healing the sick. Then Jesus went up on a mountainside and sat down with his disciples. The Jewish Passover Festival was near.

When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?” He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.

Philip answered him, “It would take more than half a year’s wages to buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!”

Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, spoke up, “Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?”

Jesus said, “Have the people sit down.” There was plenty of grass in that place, and they sat down (about five thousand men were there). Jesus then took the loaves, gave thanks, and distributed to those who were seated as much as they wanted. He did the same with the fish.

When they had all had enough to eat, he said to his disciples, “Gather the pieces that are left over. Let nothing be wasted.” So they gathered them and filled twelve baskets with the pieces of the five barley loaves left over by those who had eaten.

After the people saw the sign Jesus performed, they began to say, “Surely this is the Prophet who is to come into the world.” Jesus, knowing that they intended to come and make him king by force, withdrew again to a mountain by himself. John 6:1-15, NIV

Could you imagine Jesus looking at you and saying, “Where can we buy food to feed more than 15,000 people?” (The text says 5,000 men; D.A. Carson, in the Pillar New Testament Commentary, suggests a number north of 20,000!) This was essentially nonsensical. Philip gives us a sense of how ridiculous this request was: “It would take more than half a year’s wages to buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!” Not only that, but it would require wagonloads of bread, and finding a baker with that much bread in stock would be impossible.

Jesus asked something of his disciples that was impossible. They didn’t have what it takes.

Andrew, ever the problem solver, notices a boy with five loaves and two fish. This wouldn’t even have fed Jesus and the disciples, let alone 20,000 people!

Jesus asked the impossible.

He took what they had, gave thanks, and distributed it among the crowd. After everyone ate their fill, they had so much left over that they collected twelve baskets' worth of bread.

Can you imagine? It’s no wonder the crowd wanted to make Jesus their king.

In a world where almost everyone wondered and worried about where their next meal would come from, here was a man who fed them to the full with almost nothing.

As I stare at this story and ponder it, I cannot escape the image of Jesus taking what little the disciples had and turning it into abundance. What did the disciples do? They simply offered what they had, and then Jesus went to work. They gave what they could. With Jesus, faithfully offering whatever you have is not just enough, but more than enough.

This conversation between Jesus and his disciples is a great reminder for me that my capacity at any given moment is not the point.

I’m reminded of something my dad told me before I got married. He said, “Son, marriage isn’t 50:50. It’s 100:100. Each person gives 100% of whatever they have at the moment.” This has been so significant for me over the years of my marriage. It removed any scorecard. Sometimes my 100% appears to be Amy’s 10%, and vice versa, but the amount doesn’t matter. All that matters is that we are each offering to the other all that we can in that moment.

With Jesus, there is no scorecard. We simply bring whatever we have in that moment and trust that, through the Spirit, it will be enough.

And you know what?

It will be!

Grace so often gets pigeonholed as a salvation-only kind of idea. But it’s not. Grace is audacious. Grace looks like God taking whatever we have to offer at any particular moment and then filling in every gap. Whether we have one loaf, five loaves, or a thousand loaves, on their own, they will never be enough. The beauty is that they don’t have to be enough.

This conversation puts on display the audacious and overwhelming grace of Jesus.

I am reminded that I don’t have enough. I am reminded that I don’t have to be enough. I simply have to show up and faithfully bring whatever I have.